Copenhagen: Rudd's nauseating, sycophantic speech

Nauseating

Something about Kevin Rudd’s speeches makes my flesh creep. Tedious to the point of rigor mortis (he is, of course, the “toxic bore” – thank you, Tony Abbott, for that gem!), yet at the same time patronising and condescending – and nauseating – and pompous. How one man can be offensive in so many ways is a wonder to behold. Yet is a hugely popular prime minister back here in Australia. What gives? Anyway, let’s sample some of the best [worst – Ed] bits:

“History is calling us at this great conference to frame a grand bargain on climate change,” Mr Rudd told summit delegates on Thursday night, Australian time.”

…

History will record (the summit) as either a time when the peoples of the world, mindful of a common threat to us all, decided to act in concert against that threat, and so decided to turn the tide of history.

“Or else history will record this conference as a time when once again we became so consumed with the petty nationalisms of the past that we turned instead against each other and failed to act on this great common challenge of the future.” [Trying to sound like Churchill, are we? – Ed]

Mr Rudd quoted from a handwritten note he’d received from Gracie, a six-year-old from Canberra. [Uh oh – time to reach for that sick bag… – Ed]

“Hi, my name is Gracie. How old are you?” he read out. [Please, please stop – Ed]

“I am writing to you because I want you all to be strong in Copenhagen, please listen to us as it is our future.” [It’s coming, it’s coming… – Ed]

Mr Rudd added, “I fear that at this conference, we are on the verge of letting little Gracie down”.

Bloooaaaargghh.

Read it here (you have been warned).